Out of Context D&D Quotes

This is a blog for out of context D&D quotes. We take submissions. Not just from D&D. Feel free to submit quotes from all your table top RPG sessions!

Speaking of personal agendas, where’d he get that emu?

—The fighter, looking to get her own [undead] emu

First of all, how dare you.

—The druid to a group of undead

I am now the god of beer, children’s lessons, and foolish decisions.

— A newly minted god the party happened to meet.

"Dammit, that’s it! We are stealing the Easy Bake Oven from the Galactic Federation!"

- Our tech guy, in a moment of brilliance

borishu asked: Me (The druid): I search the trees for moss to find north *Rolls 2* DM: You fail to find moss. In fact you fail to find trees. You are looking at the sky, and have led the party miles away from the goal.

"But if you’re a mage, and I’m a mage, then WHO’S FLYING THE BOAT?"

- The party wizard and cleric arguing as the airship they’re on crashes.

Roll for Jazz

I guess you could say that this ship has… a skeleton crew.

"The door catches you flat-footed."

—DM